“His family should have a say.”
***
Three days later, the legal documents arrived.
Patty was asking for an expanded access right and a review of Olivia’s trust, using the fear she had sown at my daughter’s house as evidence that I was unstable. She claimed I wanted to wipe William out of his life.
I called Clara.
“Can you write what happened at the salon? Please, please. Patty is after… everything. »
Three days later, the legal documents arrived.
“I’ll take care of it, Allie. Don’t worry. »
“I’ll take care of it, Allie. Don’t worry. »
Dr. Keene referred us to a child psychotherapist, who noted that Olivia’s fear seemed to be reinforced by adults and caused her distress.
M. Wallace provided us with information about Patty’s call.
I photocopied the drawing, the photo and the writing of Patty. I recorded the SMS in which Patty wrote:
“William would hate to see his house change. »
« Olivia a sa place auprès de gens qui se souviennent d’où elle vient. »
Every night, I added something to the file.
I didn’t do it out of revenge, but because I was tired of letting Patty make my child bear the grief of adults.
“William would hate to see his house change. »
***
A few weeks later, the day before the mediation, Olivia came to slip into my bed, Bunny nestled under her chin.
“Mom? »
“Yes, my dear? »
“If Dad comes and I’m not at Grandma’s, will he be angry? »
I hugged her against me. “No. Dad would never be mad at you because you’re home with me. »
“But Grandma cries when I say I want to go home. »
Olivia climbed into my bed.
“It’s not your job to solve this problem, Liv. »
“But she’s so sad. »
“I know,” I said, brushing the curls of his forehead. “Adults can be sad too.”
“Do I have to pretend that Dad is coming back? »
“No, my little love. You can stop »
“Adults can be sad too. »
***
During the mediation, Patty arrived in a marine dress, squeezing William’s framed photo. M. Wallace sat next to me. Bishop opened a yellow notebook.
Patty spoke first. “I lost my son. And now I watch his wife erase him from his daughter’s life. It is neither safe nor healthy for the child. »
Mrs. Bishop turned to me. “Allie? »
I opened my file.
“I lost my son. And now I watch his wife erase him from his daughter’s life. »
“This is Clara’s statement at the hair salon. She’s been my hairdresser for years,” I explained. “She saw Olivia panic when the scissors came out. Here is Dr. Keene’s letter, which explains that Olivia’s fear was probably reinforced by an adult. Here is the drawing that Patty sent home in Olivia’s backpack. And here’s the picture with Patty’s note. »
Patty leaned forward. “It was private. »
“It was in my four-year-old’s backpack. »
Ms. Bishop took the picture and read out loud: “Don’t forget who you belong to, Olivia. »
No one spoke.
“It was private. »
M. Wallace dragged his paper over the table. “I can confirm that Patty contacted my office to get control of Olivia’s trust if Allie could be presented as unstable. »
Mrs. Bishop looks at Patty. “Did you tell Olivia that her father was coming back? »
“I told him he was always with us. »
“No,” I said. “You told her he would find her. You told her not to cut his hair because he might not recognize her. »
Patty captured William’s photo. “You put his shoes away like he would never go home. »
“I told him he was always with us. »
“Because it’s not, Patty,” I said softly. “William is dead. Nothing we’ll tell Olivia will bring him back. You’re hurting my child now. »
I hated to say that, but the truth was the only safe place left.
“You wanted his hair, his room, his clothes and his grief to remain the same,” I said. “That’s where you wanted William to stay. »
Patty’s face has distorted. “You have everything, Allie. What did I get? »
I looked at my husband’s picture, and then I came back to her.
“You wanted his hair, his room, his clothes and his grief to remain the same.”
“You had grief,” I said. “Me too. But I didn’t tell a child of mine to carry it. »
Ms. Bishop closed the file. “I will recommend this agreement to court approval: supervised visits only, advice on grief, no fiduciary control and no discussion of William’s return, inheritance or custody with Olivia. »
***
Outside, Patty was standing by the sidewalk.
“Allie,” she called.
I stopped, but I didn’t back down.
“I miss him,” she said.
“I know,” I replied. “Me too. »
I didn’t back down.
“I didn’t want to hurt Olivia,” Patty said.
“But you did. »
***
A month later, Olivia mentioned Clara as I brushed her hair before kindergarten. The comb clung on and she grimaced.
“Can Clara only cut the part that is getting entangled? »
I put the brush down. “Only if you want. »
“I want it not to hurt anymore. »
“I didn’t want to hurt Olivia. »
Clara squatted next to the chair. “You’re the one who commands today, okay? »
I stood next to her.
“You have a choice,” I said.
Olivia squeezed my fingers, but she didn’t scream.
“You’re the one who commands today, okay? »
“Mom,” she said. “Am I still like me? “
I kissed his head. “More than ever. »
That night, we put the loop in William’s memory box.
“Dad always loves me? »
“Always. Even when you’re tall. »
And this time, she believed me.
