The day after my mother’s funeral, the homeless man behind our house was gone.
For most of my childhood, Victor had lived behind our little rental in a shelter made of tarps and scrap wood. My mother had fed him every day.
When I came back with the meal she had begged me to bring him, Victor was standing beside a black SUV in a clean coat, holding my mother’s silver locket.
The one she swore she had lost when I was eight.
Victor had lived behind our little rental.
“I thought you couldn’t come, Fiona,” he said.
I nearly dropped the container.
“Victor? How?”
He looked older without the beard. His eyes were red and tired.
“I brought dinner,” I said. “But what’s going on?”
His fingers closed around the locket.
“I thought you couldn’t come, Fiona.”
“Before she died,” he said, “your mother begged me to stay silent.”
My blood went cold.
“About what?”
Victor looked toward the kitchen window, where Mom used to watch him when she thought I wasn’t looking.
“About who I am.”
“About what?”
***
At lunch every day, my mother packed three meals.
Two stayed on our chipped kitchen table. The third went into whatever plastic container she could wash and reuse for Victor.
I hated that.
I hated that my sneakers had tape over the toes while Victor got the biggest piece of chicken. We were poor too.
I was eleven the first time I said it out loud.
“He eats better than I do, Mom.”
We were poor too.
Mom didn’t look up from the stove. “Fiona, don’t start. Please.”
“Mom, the lights got cut off twice this winter,” I said. “But Victor gets lunch every day like he’s family.”
The spoon slipped from her hand and clattered into the sink.
“Don’t say his name like that, Fiona. He needs help.”
I folded my arms. I was hungry, cold, and mean in the way only a hurt child can be.
“Why? He’s just some man behind our house.”
Mom turned then, and her face had gone pale.
“Victor gets lunch every day like he’s family.”